Is being in a relationship worth all the heartaches? Falling in love is a big risk. It's like offering your heart to someone and saying, "Here, do what you like with it. I give up my control." You become vulnerable. For it is only with openness you can truly experience true love because love cannot exist without pain. You appreciate love better if there is pain and so heartaches are permanent maladies of couples who have been duped by love. Love is a paradox. So, if this is the case, how do you guard your heart?


But why do we search for love if we are already complete? Do we really need a better half? Aren't we already better by our single lonesome fabulous self? Why do women associate their worth by being in a relationship? We can survive without men. We will always feel lonely and sad even if we are in a relationship. We can also find happiness on our own. What's the difference?

Maybe because we are social beings and God ha created us not to be alone. We crave for company, for someone to build a relationship and memories with, to share life with...Just imagine, if you are able to give this kind of love to the man you were with before, how much love and sacrifice are you willing to give to the man God has ordained for you?

1. We Don't Talk Anymore by Charlie Puth

2. Sorry by Justin Bieber

3. I hate you, I love you by Gnash

4. Don't Let me Down by The Chainsmokers

8. The One that Got Away by Katy Perry

9. I'm Not The Only One by Sam Smith

10. Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone by Bill Withers

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone
It's not warm when she's away.
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone
And she's always gone too long
Anytime she goes away.
Wonder this time where she's gone
Wonder if she's gone to stay
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone
And this house just ain't no home
Anytime she goes away.
And I know, I know, I know, I know,

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone

Only darkness every day.

11. Don't Know Why by Nora Jones

My heart is drenched in wine

But you'll be on my mind

Forever

Out across the endless sea

I would die in ecstasy

But I'll be a bag of bones

Driving down the road alone

12. My Feeling by Junior Jack

When I think about you
My feelings can't explain
Why after all this time
My feelings can't explain?
You're still on my mind...

13. Stay by Lisa Loeb

and I thought what I felt was simple,
and I thought that I don't belong,
and now that I am leaving,
now I know that I did something wrong 'cause I missed you.
yeah, I missed you.

14. Officially Missing You by Tamia

All I hear is raindrops

Falling on the rooftop

Oh baby tell me why’d you have to go

Cause this pain I feel

It wont go away

And today

I’m officially missing you

I thought that from this heartache

I could escape

But I fronted long enough to know

There ain’t no way

And today

I’m officially missing you

15. Insensitive by Jann Arden

Oh, you probably won't remember me
It's probably ancient history
I'm one of the chosen few
Who went ahead and fell for you
I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch
I fell too fast, I feel too much

Maybe you might have some advice to give
On how to be insensitive

16. I Try by Macy Gray

Games, changes, and fears
When will they go from here?
When will they stop?
I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together, babe,
But we're not

I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin.

I try to say goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble

Though I try to hide it, it's clear

My world crumbles when you are not near

I may appear to be free,
But I'm just a prisoner of your love
I may seem alright and smile when you leave,
But my smiles are just a front, just a front

Here is my confession

May I be your possession

Boy, I need your touch,

Your love kisses, and such

With all my might I try,

But this I can't deny

I think heartbreaks from losing someone because of death is easier. There is a definite closure. You know they are in a better place and they will not come back to haunt you. It's a definite end to everything.

Meanwhile, break ups with the living is terrible. They will haunt you in Facebook, Instagram, in every food you eat, place you see, in every moment you live... If you are unfortunate enough to live in the same zip code, you will bump to each other in the mall or even share the same circle of friends. There is also these clouds of what ifs hanging over your head. Like what if he was the one that got away?

If you just came out of a heartbreak and trying to let go and move on, cheer up! God blessed you with a wonderful experience, no matter how brief it was. Think about it, you may even want to experience this pain over and over again just to spend an extra day with him again. Life is beautiful and so are you. It has many more surprises for you. And if you two are truly meant to be, he will pursue you. Maybe love will find a way.

If you still desire to be in a relationship and maybe one day get married, remember your lessons learned and focus on improving yourself during your waiting period. Go on solo adventures. Travel. Jump off cliffs into the deep waters and scream out your frustrations and drown your emotions. Cry if you must. Let those tears flow and wash your soul.

Read books on self-improvement and relationships or just anything that interests you. Be a modern day Proverbs 31 woman.  Learn a new survival skill like  cooking or sewing. Read the Bible and be inspired how Ruth got her Boaz. Pray without ceasing. All of these will make you a better wife and mother in the future. 

You will find the love you deserve and when you do, tell me how God wrote your love story.